But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
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Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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