i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alive.
So much puke
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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