Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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