He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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