He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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