Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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