i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
cat food counts as protein by the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Randomize