who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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