i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
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