My first STD was from a foam party
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
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