Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
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Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
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Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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