its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize