there's paper in my vomit.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
We left the knife in your bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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