Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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