you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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