The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize