I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize