my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
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