ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
it was like eating out sand paper
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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