Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
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