I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
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I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
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it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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