man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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