its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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