ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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