Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize