Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize