so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Randomize