I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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