I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
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