I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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