I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize