Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize