How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
So vagazzling was a success
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize