How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize