hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize