sarcasm needs its own font
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
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