How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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