That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Randomize