I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize