During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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