It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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