So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
This toilet bowl is my home.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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