There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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