gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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