I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
So much rum. So many feels.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize