There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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