And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize