he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
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