Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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