he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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